I have a problem.
A somewhat strange problem.
It doesn’t impact my life most of the time. But it’s beginning to be more of an issue as we move into the stage of Owen’s life where he learns his letters.
About a week ago I got Owen a set of foam letters and numbers to play with in the bath. He has shown such an interest in learning “names” of things/people/shapes/objects/places that I thought he might be excited to start to identify letters. So far he has learned several shapes (oval, circle, moon and star) and points them out everywhere. We will be driving along and all of a sudden I hear a frantic “OOOOOOOOOOOval” and he’s desperately trying to show me which oval he saw. Anyway, turns out I was right about the new bath toy. The letters are a HUGE hit. Now the issue is getting him OUT of the tub. He loves picking them up and asking “Dat!” about each one. Then he sticks it to the wall. He picked up “O is for Owen” really fast and can now find the letter “O” floating around with all of the other letters.
Anyway. Back to my little problem.
So there we are, playing in the tub, and Owen holds up the letter N. “N!” I shout. “N for … “. My mind is blank. Well, almost. Blank except for words that are not exactly toddler-friendly. Nipple? Nymphomaniac? And often words I don’t even feel comfortable writing on the internet.
B? Boobs. Bastard. Bitch.
P? Poop. Porn. Pervert.
You get the idea.
It happens to me at other times too. I’ll be on the phone with a credit card company or something and they’ll be asking me how to spell my address or my name and I’m all, “S as in …Sex”. And I can not. For the life of me. Think. Of. An. Appropriate. Word.
What is wrong with me?!
I’m not even someone who uses those words regularly. I don’t really curse. Maybe it’s because I DON’T use them? Who knows. But in any case, it sounds like someone needs to learn the NATO Phonetic Alphabet.
What’s the first word you think of that starts with the letter N? Anyone else have this strange affliction?