She Says… Zen

For all of my blog posts “worrying” about this and “stressing” about that, you’d think I would be a wreck over what I’m about to say. But I’m being totally honest when I say that I am not. At all. In fact, I’m feeling pretty darn zen and at peace with pretty much everything right now.

After a few tries over the last few days with my funky frozen milk (we’ve tried it straight, mixed with fresh milk, mixed with formula, cold, warm, etc. etc.), Owen has made it clear that he won’t drink it. Or at least, he won’t drink it without a fight. A fight reminiscent of his eating prior to reflux meds and bottle feeding. A fight that I thank my lucky stars every day that we don’t HAVE to have, now that we’ve figured out all of his issues. And frankly, the smell is so disgusting to me that I don’t enjoy feeding him, and that has become one of my favorite things to do.

So I’ve made the decision to dump all the funky milk and just give him the fresh stuff. I don’t want to spend my last full month at home with Owen scalding, freezing and defrosting milk, being nervous about how long bags have been in the freezer and sniffing all of his bottles incessantly.

Hindsight is 20/20. I wish I’d known I wouldn’t be able to use my frozen milk so I wouldn’t have worried so much about increasing my supply to put some away. Or ordered that freezer for Christmas. Oops. We haven’t picked it up yet, so maybe I can return it 🙂

In any case, I’m impressed with my new “whatever will be, will be” attitude. Maybe it’s a result of knowing my time at home with Owen as a stay-at-home mom is running out, or maybe I’ve finally learned the lesson that I’m not in control (of pretty much anything!) anymore. Either way, we’re not going to sweat this. Now there’s more room in the freezer for ice cream and homemade baby food!


10 responses to “She Says… Zen

  1. Kate, I’m happy for you…congrats on your ‘zen’ attitude!! 🙂 Enjoy these last precious weeks with Owen!

  2. You know, about that freezer, even if you’re not filling it with breast milk I think it’d still be a great thing to have! I was totally envious when I saw your post about getting one 🙂 Think of all the fresh and yummy vegetables you’ll be able to put away next summer!

  3. This too shall pass. It’s amazing how the things we agonize over just disappear with time. As long as Owen is happy and healthy, you’re making the right decisions!

  4. Was ALL of the milk yucky?? I guess I should feel pretty lucky that I’ve only noticed the smell in select bags. I’m sorry that freezing milk didn’t work out for you, but it’s nice that you feel good about everything and are still committed to pumping for now. For what it’s worth, I’ve been back at work a few days now and I’ve been producing enough fresh to cover what she’s been taking at daycare–in fact, I’ve been producing more, hence my reasoning to continue to freeze. I’m hoping my body keeps up like this! So who knows–it just may continue to work out for you after all. My job is really awesome with the pumping thing–they have an empty office set up as “The Mommy Suite” and I can take my laptop in there and continue to work as I pump, then return to my desk. But I know it’s not like that for everyone. Regardless of what happens, you’ve done a great job and have given Owen a great start! I’m just glad that you’re not upset about anything. 🙂

  5. Yeah!!! So glad you were able to make a stress-free decision! 🙂

  6. Go with it, sister & don’t look back. Other things to worry about (and enjoy!)


  7. We got a small chest freezer for breast milk and baby food, and now I’m not sure we’ll be doing many purees but I’m still grateful for the freezer 🙂 It is nice to be able to stock up on things when they’re on sale, and right after DD was born, it was great to have a few extra meals frozen for whenever I didn’t have time/energy/interest in cooking. You’ll love it 🙂

  8. I think it’s good you’re not worrying about the frozen breastmilk not working out. I think you will find as time goes on and there are bigger and more intense things to deal with as your child grows, you have to let go of things and go wth the flow to stay sane. I had to do this to, and as far as eating goes, once I gave up and stopped stressing about what foods my son was eating and what he did and did not like, it was so much easier. I now have a 2 year old that prefers necterines and broccoli over vanilla ice cream. good luck with the freezer!

  9. Keep that freezer – they are great for babyfood, and we buy organic local meat in bulk and store it – it saves us a bundle and makes meals easy. Just a thought 🙂

    Glad to hear you’re Zen – go with it!

  10. Aww, good to hear! I feel the same way. Even though there are things I get concerned about and am unsure about I’ve been surprisingly laid back about motherhood. It’s crazy how relaxed and amazing it’s been.

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