So during our years living together, Kate and I almost always went to bed at the same time. I thought this was good for our relationship, and good for my sleep. (In my bachelor days I would always stay up much later, for no real reason.) But it was nice for us to have bedtime to unwind together, whether it was to watch tv in bed, read (rarely), or, um, do other things.
That all changed early on in Kate’s pregnancy, as she got really tired, and there was no way that I would consider going to sleep in the 8 or 9 o’clock hour. So she would typically cart herself to bed hours before me leaving me to my bachelor ways again. Suddenly I was up watching late night tv again and wouldn’t go to bed until 11 or 12.
That was pretty much the way it was through most of the pregnancy, and it really hasn’t changed now that Owen is here. Sleep is so precious now (for Kate especially) that she’ll go upstairs around 8 or 8:30 to give Owen his “final” feeding before putting him to bed and then going to bed herself (by 9:30 usually). Again, that is too early for me to go to sleep. In the first few weeks after the birth, I would stay up until Owen’s next feeding (usually around 10:30 or 11) and then change him and get him ready for Kate to feed him. Now he usually does a 4 or 5 hour sleep (thankfully) after his bedtime feeding, so I don’t stay up for that next one. But instead I do my same old “bachelor” thing of staying up later than I need to, watching tv.
I have to say, though, I really appreciate having that time, and I know I probably shouldn’t even mention it because Kate hardly gets that kind of time to herself, and if she does, it’s usually spent showering, or emailing, etc.
I wonder if we’ll ever go back to going to bed at the same time. I imagine that as Owen begins to be able to sleep all night, Kate won’t feel the need to go to bed herself at 9 or 9:30. So hopefully then we can have some time to watch tv together (and actually get through a whole show without constant breaks to tend to Owen), and maybe even go to bed at the same time.