She Says… A Case of the “I Wanna”s

https://i1.wp.com/www.jackbook.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/babies-r-us-store-400x318.jpgOn my way to a friend’s baby shower yesterday morning, I popped into Babies ‘R’ Us to buy her a gift. I had checked out her registry online before I got there, so I pretty much knew what I was going to buy. But when I walked in the door, I was hit with this rush of… I don’t know exactly what it was… maybe sadness? I wandered around the store aimlessly, imagining myself picking out a stroller, registering for onesies and receiving blankets, and rushing through the aisles, baby in tow, for bottles or teething rings.

Realizing it was a slippery slope from a tinge of sadness to full-fledged self-pity, I snapped out of it, grabbed the Mommy & Me set of Aveeno products and a copy of “Goodnight Boston” (like “Goodnight Moon”… apparently they make city-specific versions… it was just too cute to pass up!) and was on my way.

Driving home I recognized that nagging feeling as a case of the “I Wanna”s. I wanna be the one having a baby. I wanna buy baby stuff. I wanna have the cute belly. I turned the radio up loud to drown them out. And I tried my best to silence them while ooohing and ahhing at each gift my friend received. And I worked especially hard to concentrate on something else while people at the party took a “pregnant lady picture” (there were several of them). The reality is that I couldn’t be happier for my friend, and I can’t wait to meet her baby in a few weeks when he/she is born. And I know that I’ll be the one celebrating someday soon!

Oh, in other news, I’ve been using my ovulation predictor kit since Wednesday and haven’t gotten a positive. Believe me, y’all would be the first (well, second) to know. My fingers are still crossed that it will happen in the next few days. If not, I call the doc on Monday and go in for a round of bloodwork and another lovely ultrasound on Tuesday to see what’s going on in there. Sigh.

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8 responses to “She Says… A Case of the “I Wanna”s

  1. Hang in there. We’re rooting for you!

  2. *hugs* I’m sorry. I won’t even let myself in a baby store. I do all my baby stuff ordering for other people online. Sounds like you did a good job at the shower though.

  3. Ugh. I feel for you! I just went through that a couple of weeks ago.

  4. I love shopping for baby stuff and I am NOWHERE near that stage, unfortunately 🙂 So many cute things all in one place!! My favorite baby thing is the stuffed animal/mini blanket…you know where the blanket looks like the dress of the animal.

  5. That was supposed to be 😦

  6. I know that feeling, that wanting something so much for yourself even while you’re happy for someone else! Goes with our IF territory, I guess.

  7. ack. i imagine how hard that could be! i get a little baby crazy in stores and around other peoples’ new babies too

  8. totally get that.
    happens to me as well.

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