She Says… You Were Right

First of all, a huge, huge thank you to everyone who read last week’s posts and reached out in comments, emails, tweets and phone calls. I apologize for not having the time to respond to each one individually, but please know that I read each one and was so touched by your words and your stories and I am so thankful to be part of such an awesome, supportive community.

There are so many layers to recovering from a miscarriage, especially for me having struggled with fertility issues in the past. An important thing I’ve learned: the physical and emotional recovery are not always on the same timeline. I find myself now feeling like I am in a great place emotionally/mentally. I am positive about the future and I’m ready to move on. I’m sad about what happened and I’m anxious about my babymaking timeline, but overall, I know we’re going to be ok and all signs point to the fact that I will get pregnant again. My physical recovery, though so many people have told me that was the easy part (though everyone admits there is NO easy part), is long and drawn out and not at all the discrete event I thought it would be. I don’t know if it’s the blood loss or the hormones or the fact that I haven’t been sleeping well, but I am WIPED. Still. A week later.

That said, I think I’m on the upswing now. My bleeding is decreasing (especially since I came home from work early yesterday and laid on the couch for 3+ hours) and I haven’t passed a large clot since Tuesday. Last night I actually got a little sleep. I feel more myself today than I have since last week. I think I’ve turned the corner.

Y’ALL WERE RIGHT. In general, I am completely unable to sit down and stop doing All The Things. I don’t know how to relax. I didn’t let myself relax, and my body paid the price this week. Yesterday’s few hours of laying on the couch (withOUT also doing work on my laptop or making phone calls or emailing on my Phone) was exactly what the doctor ordered. Exactly what YOU ordered.

So, thank you. For telling me what I knew, but somehow wouldn’t believe until everyone told me so. As soon as I finish work today I will park my butt on the couch and not lift a finger. We’ll see how long this lasts.

(Not very long, I can guarantee, because it is ONE adorable little boy’s birthday party this weekend and I have promised him a TRUCK CAKE. Now I just need to figure out how to make a truck cake… . Thank goodness for Pinterest.)

Happier posts to come next week! Promise!

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13 responses to “She Says… You Were Right

  1. I love being told that I’m right.

    I still vote for buying a truck cake. He’ll never know the difference.

  2. Lot’s of love, hugs and kisses to help you stay put on the couch… :)

  3. Awww thanks for the update Kate, I have been thinking about you! A truck cake for a now TWO year old (wow!) – I can’t think of a better thing to concern myself with (while resting, of course) ;-)

  4. Very pleased to hear you’ve given yourself a break. If like me it’s hard to admit defeat sometimes and although you very much want to give the big 2 fingers to whatever ‘challenge’ thats currently been dropped in your lap, sometimes you have to say ‘ok you win’. Give yourself some time hun and be kind to yourself! Xxxx

  5. I’m very happy to see you took some time for yourself! :)

  6. Good girl!!! I’m glad you took some time and just sat. It’s oh so very important. Healing, both emotionally and physically, is a process.

    I hope you guys have an absolute blast at Owen’s birthday party!! It’s so hard to believe he’s 2!!!

  7. Glad to hear you are feeling better. Oh, and just so you know, you can check out pinterest from the couch. In fact, I think it’s the best place to be while viewing it!

  8. I second the vote for buying a truck cake. (stop making that disapproving face) He really WON’T know the difference. xxxx

  9. I third the vote for buying a truck cake. Give yourself a little more time and TLC, Kate — we’re demanding you do it ;) Just teasing but in all seriousness, I’m glad you’re taking it easy. It’s SO hard. I haven’t gone through what you’ve been through, but it’s always hard for me to relax so I can only imagine how much harder it would be during such a tough time — but your body needs it. Love and hugs being sent your way!

  10. Glad you took it easy a bit! Keep resting when you can, but good luck with the birthday party. Wishing you continued healing and peace.

  11. Oh Kate! I’m so so sorry to read about your miscarriage. I haven’t been reading lately, but just checked in today. I’m glad you’re starting to feel better and that you have happy things like Owen’s birthday coming up. Keep resting. Sending you lots of hugs.

  12. I am so late on this (catching up on blogs after a busy couple of weeks), and I’m tearing up for you. I’m so sorry you had to go through this and so very glad you’re starting to feel better. *hugs*

  13. Hi Kate,
    I found an email you wrote me over a year ago when you’d discovered my blog, and I thought I’d check in and see if you wanted to get together sometime. And then I learned about your recent miscarriage. I am so sorry, Kate, for your loss. I know we don’t know each other personally, but I do unfortunately know how you’re feeling right now and I’d like to offer to help if you need someone to talk to about how shitty this feels or if you need someone to bring you cookies or play with your son in the park so you can have a break. Don’t worry about responding to this. The last thing you need is to feel obligated to do anything. Just take care of yourself and squeeze that sweet boy of yours as often as possible.
    Much love,
    Andrea

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